YOU ARE YOUR OWN IDENTITY
By Annabelle Macford Okwara
Identity is defined as what identifies somebody or something: It is the name or essential character that identifies somebody or something
Your identity consists roughly of what makes you unique as an individual and different from others. It is a means through which people can point you out from a crowd. It is a way you see yourself and it goes to show how others will see you or perceive you.
I have heard series of talks and sermons on identity; discovering who you are and all but that is not what we are concerned with as it relates to this topic. We are concerned with having a strong and positive personal identity not just in your corporate environment but in everything you do and everywhere you find yourself.
I don’t intend to get too deep into this or saying stuff like “you must discover yourself’, “look deeply into yourself”. If you ask me, it’s really not realistic. Like I said, I have heard series of lectures of this sort and it still is a bit fuzzy. I intend to simplify it, make it easy to connect with. That way, one can live everyday forming his identity and realizing that every action we take daily forms who we are and who people take us to be.
Some people may think that it doesn’t matter, but I say it does. People have been recommended for offices, strategic positions and better opportunities through referrals from people they have worked with or worked for. It is as a result of a positive identity that a former boss will refer a former employee when asked for someone to occupy a particular office; it doesn’t just apply to a former boss. It applies to everything and everybody around us.
No one will believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself. If you are a confident person, it will show in everything you do, it shows in how you walk, and how you talk. It forms how people identify you. If you are sluggish and lazy, it becomes your identity. One’s identity could be dishonesty or honesty. You may be known as someone who is always well dressed and articulate. You may also be known as a loud mouthed and arrogant person. These are the attributes that form your identity, these are the attributes that make you who you are and what people say about you. When it’s time to describe you, those attributes surface.
Defining our own personal identity can take a lifetime, sometimes it gets complicated because our identity changes from time to time especially during a period of personal development. More so complicated because there are some aspects of our identity we don’t even realize that we have. Others have to open our eyes to them, or we have to make a conscious effort to watch what we do, how we react to situations.
Identity is a core and unavoidable part of all our lives. We must be thoughtful, proactive and rigorous about our own identity. Focusing on and answering a few key questions will allow you to shape your identity and thus make your life meet the expectations you have of yourself. Whether you agree or not, everyone has an identity. You may think you don’t matter. But you do have an identity, so it’s better you start forming a positive identity and stop concerning yourself with whether you matter or not. Everyone is known for something, that “something” becomes your identity.
When you are always late to a meeting, it becomes a part of your identity. When you are always angry, it sooner or later forms part of your identity. When you yell at people, it forms part of your identity. So while you’re busy thinking about who you are, just focus on how you carry on every day, because your daily actions is who you are. It is what stands you out from the rest. It is who you are. It is your identity.
Let’s get something straight. Your identity is not just what you say you are. It is more about what others say that you are. Saying that you are a good person is meaningless unless you actually do good to others. I’m not saying you should live your life trying to get people’s approval and acceptance in all you do. All I’m saying is that you build for yourself a strong and positive identity, one that will speak well for you in your absence.